This week I have been continuing to feel much better, so much so, that I feel the yearning to return to my regular way of life. This is exciting, but also makes me feel wary, knowing that it would be easy to push myself too much. Therefore, much of this week was still about balancing when I should ask people for help and when I could do things by myself.
Returning to regular life means driving myself around more and more. I’m still avoiding the highways, but I can tell my anxiety levels are becoming reduced. Most of the time I no longer have the lingering feeling that a car is going to slam into the back of us when we make a turn (when husband is driving) and I haven’t physically looked behind us.
It makes me grateful that I already have a therapist. It has been neat to share with her how well I’m doing using my counselor skills to help calm/soothe myself about my driving anxieties. Being afraid to drive is a completely legitimate fear…we talk about firearms being dangerous, but this week on the way to Bible Study I saw an accident on the roads I regularly travel! I feel like we need to develop a much better and much safer system, like right now, like yesterday.
There are not many pictures for you this week, although husband and I did take tons of photos over the weekend. We were exploring downtown using our DSLR and have discovered a new couple hobby :0) (One that I have a greater interest in for once!).
Sunday was interesting for various reasons. Around midnight our beautiful beagle baby decided to unwisely (but very characteristically) eat kitty cookies and kitty food. She tried to hop onto the bed. It seemed like her legs weren’t working correctly, so I pulled her up. Then, her legs began to shake more violently and I smelled a strange scent. Husband quickly realized that she was having a seizure.
She’d never had one before and I quickly googled it, all the while wondering what this meant for my fur baby. He took her to her crate, but on the way there she puked, it clearly wasn’t over. He ran her outside and asked for our neighbor to watch her (being unsure of my back and getting quickly outside). I was tearing up, not knowing if she was really “okay.”
Finally, he gave me instruction, to go and sit with her. Our neighbor heard my sniffles and began to help soothe me too, telling me she’d be okay. She said that the most important thing was to help them calm down, so they wouldn’t be afraid anymore. So I did what any mom should do, I sucked up my own fears, and forced myself to radiate calm for my baby. After a little while the shaking stopped and she began to wander around. Our neighbor returned with a bone shaped dog cookie. Daisy jumped up and bit half of it out of her hand before she could even get it to her. It felt better to see my baby more like herself, and the website wasn’t joking when it warned she’d be starving afterwards.
She got a good scrub and was put in her crate for the night. I still kind of wanted to hold her close to sleep, just to know she’d be okay. The next day she was low on energy, but seemed to be doing alright. As of today she can be seen with her tail wagging, bounding around with more of her normal energy levels (though right now she’s passed out on the couch, poor sleepy puppy!)
Sunday after church we went swimming in a friend’s community pool. They’d been swimming while I waited at the pool last time, but I felt more secure of my footing to get into the water. I LOVED IT! I purposely pushed myself to tread water more; it was like my body was hungry for exercise. It felt awesome :0). Here’s to being able to run soon!